Desire and Intimacy

One of the frequent and painful paradoxes of romantic life is that the more we get to know and love someone, the harder it can be to summon up any sincere…

What Makes a Person Attractive?

Understandably enough, our societies pay vast attention to the idea of ‘sexiness’; far more questionably, they tempt us to believe that it might be easy to understand what this quality consists…

How to Talk About Your Sexual Fantasy

There’s something you are longing to try or a fantasy that grips your imagination – rough sex, a special garment you’d like to them to wear or perhaps a scenario involving…

The Problem of Sexual Shame

We have collectively grown highly attuned to the problems associated with a lack of shame around sex: with a decadent culture in which it seems that everything goes, where the atmosphere…

Who Initiates Sex: and Why It Matters So Much

It can seem a highly trivial subject to get so upset about – being rightly no more significant than who should open the door first, or open a new jam jar…

On Still Being a Virgin

When the sexual revolution began in the 1960s, there was a standard understanding of what should happen: ‘sexual liberation’ would mean that people would be freed to have more of the…