Relationships
The Courage to Love Again
It’s odd, surely, to use the word ‘courage’ – the thing you need in air raid shelters and cancer wards…
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Relationships
A Crucial Sign That Someone is Worth Going Out With
There is one sign that more than any other indicates that someone may well be a rewarding and trustworthy person to go out with: that they are prepared to go to therapy.
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Relationships
There Are No Small Issues in Love
The only way to prevent the largest problems is to focus exhaustively and with dark good humour on the very smallest ones.
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Relationships
On Not Being Very Good at Love
Our romantic fiascos can get a little less arduous the more we can bring ourselves to shrug our shoulders and confess with a very dark smile: I really can’t do this thing called love.
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Relationships
Leaving in Search of a Worse Relationship
Common sense dictates that people leave relationships because they wish, in essence, to find someone better: someone better able to…
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Relationships
On Seeing an Ex’s Profile on a Dating App
There will have been versions of this in other eras, of course. Seeing their name on the board for the…
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Sociability
Eight Rules for Friendship
A Community Dedicated to Learning the Art of Friendship We are inclined to think that the secret of great friendship…
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Self-Knowledge
How All Meanness Is Inherited
When someone is mean to us without good cause – pushes us away cruelly in love, bullies us at work,…
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Relationships
The Repetition Compulsion
One of the most remarkable ideas in the history of psychoanalysis is to be found in Freud’s 1920 paper ‘Beyond…
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Self-Knowledge
Why We Become Unable to Protect Ourselves
There are people who, in most walks of life, are extremely canny and highly able to look after themselves. They…
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Relationships
Beware Those We Fall in Love With
The word ‘madness’ tends to bring to mind distinctly lurid and macabre associations: psychiatric wards, staring eyes, murder weapons, hideous…
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Self-Knowledge
Mental Illness and Love
When we speculate on the causes of mental illness, we typically imagine some form of chemical imbalance or damage to…
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