Chapter 3
Relationships
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01.If We're All Bad at Love, Shouldn't We Change Our Definition of Normality?
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02.Other People's Relationships
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03.In Praise of Unrequited Love
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04.The Cure for Love
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05.How to Seduce Someone on a Date
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06.What is Love?
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07.Why Flirting Matters
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08.How Romanticism Ruined Love
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09.How We Choose a Partner
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10.Our Most Romantic Moments
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11.Reasons to Remain Single
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12.A Short History of Love
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13.Loving and Being Loved
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14.The Problems of Being Very Beautiful
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15.On Romanticism
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16.How to Enjoy a New Relationship
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17.On Flirtation
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18.On Finding the 'Right' Person
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19.Artificial Conversations
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20.On the Role of Stories in Love
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21.On the Madness and Charm of Crushes
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22.On Being Romantic or Classical
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23.On Marrying the Wrong Person
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24.How to Break Up
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25.'Unfair Dismissal' in Love
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26.Why Anxious and Avoidant Partners Find It Hard to Leave One Another
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27.Why We Should Not Silently Suffer From A Lack of Touch in Love
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28.Why Anger Has a Place in Love
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29.The Challenges of Anxious-Avoidant Relationships
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30.What We Might Learn in Couples Therapy
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31.An Alternative to Being Controlling
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32.How to Complain So a Partner Will Listen
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33.On the Tendency to Love and Hate Excessively
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34.Coping with Betrayal
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35.The Importance of Atonement
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36.What Is Wrong with Your Partner - and Why?
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37.How Are You Difficult to Live with?
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38.The Importance of Relationship Counselling
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39.For Moments of Marital Crisis
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40.How to Argue in Relationships
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41.Why Tiny Things about Our Partners Drive Us Mad
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42.Be the Change You Want To See
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43.I Wish I Was Still Single
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44.Why We Go Cold on Our Partners
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45.The Standard Marriage and Its Seven Alternatives
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46.Love and Sulking
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47.Teaching and Love
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48.An Instruction Manual to Oneself
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49.How to Get Over a Rejection
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50.How to End a Relationship
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51.Beyond Feminism
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52.Stay or Leave?
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53.Why Affectionate Teasing is Kind and Necessary
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54.The Couple Courtroom Game
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55.Getting over a Row
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56.How to Get Divorced
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57.How to Get Divorced
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58.On the Fear of Intimacy
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59.The Secret Problems of Other Couples
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60.On the Dangers of Being Too Defensive
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61.On How to Defuse an Argument
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62.How Not to Break Up with Someone
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63.Why You Resent Your Partner
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64.A Lover's Guide to Sulking
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65.If You Loved Me, You Wouldn't Want to Change Me
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66.How 'Transference' Makes You Hard to Live With
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67.Why It Is Always Your Partner's Fault
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68.If It Wasn't for You...
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69.Why You Are So Annoyed By What You Once Admired
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70.Why You’re (Probably) Not a Great Communicator
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71.The Problems of Closeness
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72.What to Do on Your Wedding Night
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73.On Still Being a Virgin
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74.The Meaning of Infidelity
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75.Love and Sex
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76.How to Seduce with Confidence
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77.Impotence and Respect
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78.Why Polyamory Won’t Work for You
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79.Loyalty and Adultery
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80.Sexual Non-Liberation
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81.The Excitement of Keeping Clothes On
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82.The Excitement of Kissing
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83.The Appeal of Outdoor Sex
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84.The Sexual Fantasies of Others
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85.On Art and Masturbation
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86.The Psychology of Cross-Dressing
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87.The Fear of Being Bad in Bed
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88.The Sex-Starved Relationship
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89.Why People Have Affairs: Distance and Closeness
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90.How to Start Having Sex Again
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91.On Forgetting Lovers
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92.The Poignancy of Old Pornography
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93.On Porn Addiction
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94.A Brief Philosophy of Oral Sex
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95.On Being a Sleazebag
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96.Why We Go Off Sex
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97.A Brief Theory of Sexual Excitement
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106.How We Can Have Our Hearts Broken Even Though No One Has Left Us
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107.The Psychology of our Exes
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108.How Not to Be Tortured By a Love Rival
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109.What Is Your Attachment Style?
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110.On Rescue Fantasies
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111.Two Reasons Why You Might Still Be Single
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112.How to Cope with an Avoidant Partner
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113.The Secrets of a Privileged Childhood
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114.'I Will Never Find the Right Partner'
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115.Too Close or Too Distant: How We Stand in Relationships
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116.What Should Go in Your Wedding Album?
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117.Who Should You Invite to Your Wedding?
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118.Pragmatic Reasons for Getting Married
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119.Why We're Compelled to Love Difficult People
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120.Why Your Lover is Very Damaged - and Annoying
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121.The Pleasure of Reading Together in Bed
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122.Why We Need the Ancient Greek Vocabulary of Love
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123.Twenty Ideas on Marriage
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124.The Incumbent Problem
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125.22 Questions to Reignite Love
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126.The Wisdom of Romantic Compromise
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127.How to Love Ugly People
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128.Political Correctness vs. Politeness
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129.Daddy Issues
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130.Why Old Friends Matter
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131.Why Family Matters
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132.Why We (Sometimes) Hope the People We Love Might Die
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133.Can Exes be Friends?
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134.How to Complain
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135.How to Get Over Someone
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136.Why Only the Happy Single Find True Love
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137.How We Need to Keep Growing Up
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138.Why, Once You Understand Love, You Could Love Anyone
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139.Love and Self-Love
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140.Humour in Love
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141.The Terrors of Being Loved
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142.Why True Love Doesn’t Have to Last Forever
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143.The Partner as Child Theory
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144.The Advantages of Long-Distance Love
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145.On Being Unintentionally Hurt
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146.In Praise of Hugs
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147.On Compromise
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148.Meet the Parents
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149.How Not to Think on a Date
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150.Keeping Secrets in Relationships
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151.On the Serious Role of Stuffed Animals
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152.Utopian Marriage
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153.On the Longing for Maternal Tenderness
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154.When Is One Ready to Get Married?
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155.On the Longing for Authority
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156.On the Continuing Relevance of Marriage
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157.On the Hardest Job in the World
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158.On Charity
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159.On Socks and Friendship
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160.On the Beloved's Wrist