Relationships
The Psychology of Avoidance
One of the most perplexing of all our behaviours is our tendency – in relationships – to flee from the…
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Fear & Insecurity
The Five Features of Paranoia
There are perhaps five main features of the very sad, indeed hellish, condition we know as paranoia…
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Fear & Insecurity
Why So Many of Us Are Masochists
We ‘love’ pain for being profoundly familiar; we love it for taking us home.
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Relationships
Changing Yourself Rather Than Trying to Change Your Partner
We know – of course – that they urgently need changing. Where do we start with the problems? They are…
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Relationships
A Chance to Be Bad in Relationships
It sounds odd to suggest that one of the things we may most long for, and in a sense even…
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Relationships
Four Kinds of Sexual Deviancy and What They Really Mean
We don’t typically imagine that sexual deviants have very much to teach us about anything. We tend to read of…
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Calm
Keep Going
Giuseppe de Nittis, Winter Landscape, 1880 It’s early morning in the middle of winter and we’re in a northern suburb…
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Relationships
When One Person Has to Be Needy so the Other Can Feel Invulnerable
Sometimes, without anything being explicitly said, couples come to certain remarkably awkward and sinister agreements between them about who might…
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Relationships
Offering Love to Someone Who Is Not Convinced of Their Loveability
There are distinct challenges around trying to offer love to someone who isn’t convinced that they are, deep down, worthy…
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Relationships
Using AI to Have Better Relationships
It’s understandably daunting to be invited to rely on a machine to do something that, throughout our lives, we’d believed…
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Calm
The Letter You May Need to Send to Save Your Life
For very understandable reasons, we spend an enormous amount of energy trying to make sure that we come across to…
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Relationships
Changing Yourself Rather Than Trying to Change Your Partner
We know – of course – that they urgently need changing. Where do we start with the problems? They are…
View
Relationships
A Chance to Be Bad in Relationships
It sounds odd to suggest that one of the things we may most long for, and in a sense even…
View
Relationships
Four Kinds of Sexual Deviancy and What They Really Mean
We don’t typically imagine that sexual deviants have very much to teach us about anything. We tend to read of…
View
Calm
Keep Going
Giuseppe de Nittis, Winter Landscape, 1880 It’s early morning in the middle of winter and we’re in a northern suburb…
View
Relationships
When One Person Has to Be Needy so the Other Can Feel Invulnerable
Sometimes, without anything being explicitly said, couples come to certain remarkably awkward and sinister agreements between them about who might…
View
Relationships
Offering Love to Someone Who Is Not Convinced of Their Loveability
There are distinct challenges around trying to offer love to someone who isn’t convinced that they are, deep down, worthy…
View
Relationships
Using AI to Have Better Relationships
It’s understandably daunting to be invited to rely on a machine to do something that, throughout our lives, we’d believed…
View
Calm
The Letter You May Need to Send to Save Your Life
For very understandable reasons, we spend an enormous amount of energy trying to make sure that we come across to…
View