Stay Or Leave?
It can be remarkably hard to know what level of compromise, hard work, difficulty and everyday scratchiness we should accept in love. On the one hand, our culture presents us with seductive images of constant intense love and passion; on the other, we hear reminders that relationships are hard work and that we should keep our expectations in check.
How then are we to assess the relationships that come our way? How can we decide what the right, sensible level of joy and frustration might be?
This class takes an audit of love in general and our relationships in particular. It examines the following topics:
- How much should two people argue and how should they do it?
- What should a partner understand about us? And what should we not expect them to grasp?
- How do we assess our own ideas of a ‘deal-breaker’?
- What level of sexual satisfaction is to be expected?
Aside from auditing our attitudes to love, this class shows us that many of the answers we crave around love are already within us – and offers a variety of approaches for improving or exiting relationships – giving us the tools to put our desires into practice.
'Love rests on two pillars: surrender and autonomy. Our need for togetherness exists alongside our need for separateness.'
― Esther Perel
Dr. Sumant Badami (or Monty as he is known to most) is an Anthropologist and Honorary Associate at Macquarie University. Apart from being a passionate educator at primary, secondary and tertiary levels, he is a celebrant, jazz singer, martial arts instructor and currently training to become an officer in the Australian Army Reserves. He is fascinated by the experiences and habits of real people all over the world. He is driven to understand our humanity in all its shapes and forms; from how we physically evolved to become this completely weird and flawed species, to how we survived in spite of these flaws to populate nearly every square inch of the planet and live successfully in so many different ways. He is excited about human evolution, religion and ritual, identity, human agency, gender, power, politics and the state.