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How To Find Love

Choosing a partner is one of the trickiest and most consequential decisions we will ever make. The costs of repeated failure, in terms of distress and wasted time, are immense. Partners used to be found for us by parents and society, but now we are expected to follow our feelings - to locate people by ourselves, according to intuition. This should be an improvement, but all too often our emotions pull us towards hugely problematic characters and dynamics, according to a logic we seldom fully understand.

In How to Find Love, we will:

  • Improve our understanding of why we make the choices we do.
  • Discover how our early experiences give us scripts regarding whom we can love, and how.
  • Examine harmful repetitive patterns.
  • Examine the extent to which we choose people who make us unhappy.
  • Study three of the most common techniques by which we sabotage our chances of fulfilment.
  • Learn how there are always more possible partners than we initially believe.
  • Broaden our unconscious scripts for whom we can love.

This class equips us with a crucial set of insights to help us make safer, more imaginative and more effective choices in love.


18.40            Welcome buffet & drinks
19.00            Class commences
20.15            Break (times vary)
21.30            Class finishes


14.10            Welcome & drinks
14.30            Class commences
15.45            Break (times vary)
17.00            Class finishes

Course Leader

David Waters is a journalist and a counsellor who works with couples and individuals in private practice in central London. He is an accredited member of the BACP (British Association of Counsellors and Psychotherapists). David regularly writes on men’s fashion and lifestyle for UK and international newspapers and magazine including the Telegraph, the New York Observer and Departures. He has been a faculty member at The School of Life since 2010.

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This class is in a sequence with How to Make Love Last and Stay or Leave which together cover The School of Life's ideas on relationships. 

About Classes

Our classes have been designed to give useful insights around the big themes in life. You’ll be challenged to think deeply about the issues that matter most, and provided with a space to share your thoughts, ideas and experiences with other curious, open-minded individuals.

These sessions are designed by experts and taught by members of our faculty. They include a mix of lecture, conversation and group activity.


We offer a 10% standard ticket price reduction on events under £60 for Students with valid ID, Over-65's, the un-waged and people with disabilities. Click here for more information.

How To Find Love



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How To Find Love

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    Please note that we are unable to offer refunds or transfers less than 10 days before the event.