Stay or Leave?

Stay or Leave?

This is a class to help us decide whether a relationship has a future or not. The decision whether we should stay or leave is among the most challenging any of us has to make. It is difficult principally because every relationship, even a highly workable one, is at many points somewhat tricky.

So we must assess whether our difficulties are worth enduring or are an obstacle that we should and must - when we feel brave - sidestep. Is our relationship essentially normal in its frustrations, or is it beset by unusually pathological patterns that should impel us to get out as soon as we can? Are we in danger of compromising too much? Or too little?

The class contains a set of reflections and questions to help us clarify some of the core issues we should work through before quitting or committing.

Stay or Leave? probes at some of the background ideas that haunt us around relationships, for example:

  • • Should we think through whether to leave or go with our feelings?

  • • Whether a new relationship is likely to end up better than the one we are in.

  • • Why the idea of normality can lead us to bad decisions.

  • • Does being lonely mean you should leave?

  • • Is it a bad sign if you bicker?

  • • Is sex ever fulfilling long-term?

  • • Are you ready to choose?
    What is 'good enough'?

  • • Can you ever fall in love again? 

The class doesn’t have one answer. It seeks rather usefully to complicate the way we are looking at the choices before us. It reminds us that many of the answers we need are within us already, waiting for the correct tool to extract them.

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This class is in a sequence with How to Make Love Last and How to Find Love which together cover The School of Life's ideas on relationships. 


Our classes have been designed to give useful insights around the big themes in life. You’ll be challenged to think deeply about the issues that matter most, and provided with a space to share your thoughts, ideas and experiences with other curious, open-minded individuals.

These sessions are designed by experts and taught by members of our faculty. They include a mix of lecture, conversation and group activity. 

To get an idea of what to expect from classes, workshops and events in our classroom, watch this short film. 

Details for Thu 15th Jun 2017

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18.40            Welcome buffet & drinks
19.00            Class commences
20.15            Break (times vary)
21.30            Class finishes


The School of Life
70 Marchmont Street

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